day 04

Like crap.

In the back of my mind, at breakfast, I was already planning to screw it up.
But I made it worst.

Meal outing was a bad bad bad idea.
Went out with old cell girls... And I couldn't concentrate on the company, only what was before us laid on the table.

Came back like crap and dinner with the 2 other girls was like shit too.
Made another girl think about how bad she felt, she cried, I tried to cheer her up, and she rejected my little note with just smiley faces. The other girl seem to just ignore.
And I seriously regret sharing with them.
No idea what led me to say so much. I am NOT having SELF-PITY.

I feel outcast, extra.
I am the only shit ass person who decided to admit myself here, the only stupid person who's parent does not know (and I chose it), the one with so many layers of complication.

I don't want to say anything anymore or be associated anymore.
I just want to isolate myself and drop dead to the entire world.

Feeling more and more alone and screwed up.

Dear God, what now???